Tuesday, June 11, 2013

14 reasons why the Miami Heat are loathsome

Last year, I posted about 10 reasons why I hate the Miami Heat. Well, I’ve been watching them in the playoffs the last couple of months, and I have a few more to add.

PS: yes, I’m recycling my own ideas. A lot of ad people have made a career out of it. Deal.

1. The entire home crowd wears white. It’s like an albino mime convention.

2. The carnival-barker PA announcer. Chalmers hits a 12-foot jumper in the first quarter of a January game against Cleveland, and you’d think they’d just hit the Powerball. “MAAAAAAARIO CHALLLLLLLL-MERRRRRRS! FROM DUWAYYYYYYYYNE WAAAAAADE!!” This goes on for 14 seconds after every score.

3. LeBron’s arrogance.

4. Wade’s arrogance.

5. Spoelstra’s overbite.

6. Bosh’s resemblance to Dino the Dinosaur from The Flintstones.

7. Miller's hair. Vince Van Patten called, he wants his 'do back.

8. The floppingest floppers in floppingdom.

9. Haslem letting his nasty saliva-dripping black mouthpiece hang sideways out of his piehole after every shot he makes

10. Chris Anderson's tattoo. On his neck. That reads FREE BIRD.  

11. Three-point bricklayer/future President of the United States/whitest African-American in the NBA/ex-Dukie Shane Battier.

12. Spoelstra is dating a Miami Heat cheerleader.

13. In the autumn of his career, Dwyane Wade has become the dirtiest player in the NBA.


Patrick Scullin said...

Great list, Gary, and you didn't even use LeBron's "The Decision" which began this whole slide into the depths of hateworthiness.

G.D. said...

"The Decision" is so universally loathed, it didn't merit mention.

Ted said...

Why I hate Obama and everyone who voted for him.

1. He goes to bed rather than send help for Americans under attack in Libya.
2. He uses the IRS to harass political opponents.
3. He is responsible for over 200 Mexicans being killed with guns he gave to Drug Cartels through the Fast and Furious program.
4. He lies evey time he speaks.
5. He is a communist.
6. He hates America.
7. He hates the Constitution.
8. He has an ugly wife who is extremely annoying.
9. He never actually does anything but go on free vacations paid for by me.
10. He comes back from the free vacations.
11. He won't say what he does with Reggie Love.
12. He likes to give the American people the finger.
13. He permitted Jon Corzine to steal $2 billion from MF Global depositors where he was CEO and instructed Eric Holder to not prosecute, because Democrat Senators and Governors are supposed to steal. It is in their genes.
14. He is evil.
15. He was elected purely on lies dreamed up by infantile Chicago marketing doofuses. He actually had never done anything of note prior to being elected President, except having sex with Michelle at least twice, which he probably had Reggie do in his place. That would have been really hard.
16. He is a disgusting Muslim.
17. He had two autobiographies written for him before he had ever accomplished anything. He is too stupid and lazy to write his own.
18. He spent most of his high school years smoking dope.
19. He is intentionally destroying the American economy.
20. His fans are incredibly stupid, getting most of their news from Comedy Central.

Anonymous said...

Because of this reinforcing the aerobic Nuviante exercising with an anaerobic pastime will not best verify that the fat might be removed however the muscle mass can also be protected from the metabolism of the frame.For more ==== >>>>>> http://ultimatemuscleblackeditionrev.com/nuviante/

Anonymous said...

It should be said that gaining and then Grow XL maintaining a healthy weight range should really be looked at as a lifestyle option rather than a short term project. If you need to lose weight quickly however.For more ==== >>>>>> http://ultimatemuscleblackeditionrev.com/grow-xl/

Anonymous said...

This without a doubt lets you get a honest Megadrox amount of exercise with none conscious attempt in your component.find a buddy on the fitness center this is devoted to the agenda and a actual health freak. he'll drag you to the fitness center till it will become a habit for you.For more ==== >>>>>> http://novusantiagingserumrev.com/megadrox-reviews/

Anonymous said...

Last few years witnessed a type of GROW XL recession in public members of the family offerings however now the time has changed and shortly it will likely be rolling over to become the usa's pinnacle companies growing at a blistering tempo of 30-50 per cent.For more ==== >>>>>> http://ultimatemuscleblackeditionrev.com/grow-xl/

Unknown said...

After your instructions whilst you revise Opti Memory the lessons for tests have paper and a pen accessible for being attentive to the principle factors and important data at the same time as analyzing.For more ==== >>>>>> http://realcemasculinobr.com/opti-memory/


Propecia is said to be the world's most Blackcore Edge Max popular hair loss remedy. it's miles made up of of a pill which must be taken on a normal basis. In assessments 2/3 of men said that they'd had some quantity of hair regrowth at the same time as five sixths stated that that they had maintained the thickness of hair that they had.For more ==== >>>>>> http://www.healthsupreviews.com/blackcore-edge-max-review/

DarryPenoy said...

Rest is a key component in strain comfort it Zynev makes you experience light, allowing someone to experience peace and serenity.there are various pressure strategies that can be carried out with the aid of human beings who've excessive-pressure lives.For more ==== >>>>>> http://guidemesupplements.com/is-zynev-scam/

Anonymous said...

Enjoy intense hair loss insomnia which Grow XL means you feel tired and lack power throughout the day indignant or puffy eyes often the onset of Grave s ailment or very considerably you can be afflicted by weight loss despite having what you consider to be an expanded urge for food.For more ==== >>>>>> http://www.healthsupreviews.com/grow-xl/